30 Insights From A Trauma Survivor In Recovery From Spiritual Bypassing

I have an awesome new housemate, Shannon Gilcrease. She is a powerful, brilliant, gifted, beautiful, insightful, intelligent, unbelievable healer. She’s also a trauma survivor in recovery from spiritual bypassing tendencies (she calls it “rose-colored glasses”) who is doing the hardcore shadow work and painful trauma healing such a journey requires. I’m crazy proud of her for her badassery, unfuckwithability, and bravery! She wrote a list of what she’s learned in life and in therapy, and with her consent, I’d love to share it with you here.

Shannon says, “I invite you to receive what resonates for you…leave the rest.

  1. Ask for help before it’s too late! This is worth repeating – ask for help before it’s too late. 
  2. TRUST, TRUST TRUST – Trust those that truly have your back, trust your inner guidance system and trust the light as your greatest protector.
  3. Let go of hopes and expectations around those that have a proven track record of being harmful and untrustworthy – even after multiple chances to prove otherwise.
  4. As the saying goes – it is in giving that you receive – these are reciprocal acts. 
  5. Receive, Receive, Receive when offered support from those that are reliable, trustworthy, and truly care about your overall well-being.
  6. Unconditional Love is not transactional. It doesn’t keep score, threaten, beg, or power over – it’s UNCONDITIONAL!
  7. Believe in the magic because the magic is real.
  8. Stop trying to rescue those that are swimming in the La Brea tar pits of darkness…they will suck you in if you’re not careful (See #3)
  9. Stop over/underestimating yourself – find the middle ground, anchor in your center, and step confidently into your own skin.
  10. Naivete and innocence can be both helpful and dangerous.
  11. Bravery and courage without common sense are dangerous. 
  12. Bravery and courage require clarity and intention.
  13. Integrity is not optional – say what you mean, mean what say, and do what you say you’re going to do.
  14. Follow up. Period.
  15. Most of us are stronger and more resilient than we could possibly imagine.
  16. PRAY.
  17. Seek treatment through professional therapy, energy healing, rituals, and ceremonies to release painful past memories and move forward.   
  18. Avoid talking about the past in the present tense – your body/mind responds to language. Refer to the past – “In the past I was x, now I am x.”
  19. Be intentional. Set daily, weekly, monthly, annual intentions, plan for the life you desire, and create it through diligent, thoughtful action each and every day.
  20. Install the adult operating system and upgrade frequently. 
  21. No more giving in to the destructive, spoiled, entitled, tantrumy inner child. Instead, ask her/him what she/he needs and wrap your love around that need and soothe her/him just like you would your own child or pet.  
  22. Be your own best advocate for your health and well-being.
  23. Self-forgiveness is the most important forgiveness.
  24. Share your gifts, speak your truth and stand up for yourself.
  25. There is nothing free about freedom!
  26. Take your power back, reclaim your sovereignty and be relentless about your boundaries. 
  27. Sit up and stand up straight – attitude and approach matter.
  28. Honor and respect are best modeled by how you honor and respect yourself ie. self-care, healthy boundaries, personal integrity, owning your value, and being accountable for your behavior.
  29. Commit to a code for living. I recommend the 4 Agreements – Don’t take anything personally, Don’t make assumptions, Always do your best, and Be Impeccable with your words.  Golden Rule is always sound advice  – Do unto others as you would like others to treat you. 


What about you? What have you learned from your own healing journey?



Lissa Rankin



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