Blog
Thanksgiving, National Day of Mourning, Reckoning With American History, & A Lot of Mixed Feelings
Growing up, Thanksgiving was always my favorite. Fall was my favorite season- the first cool chill of sweater weather and relief from the blazing heat of Florida, where I grew up. I adored the holiday art projects- the oranges, reds, and browns, the headdress feathers...
11 Things I’ve Learned From All The Cult Documentaries & Podcasts
Because two people in my inner circle are in recovery from controlling relationships and cultic abuse, I've been educating myself by watching all the cult documentaries, reading books about cult recovery, and listening to all the podcasts, like my favorite, Rachel...
Contempt, Blanket Training, And Complex-PTSD, Oh My
In couple’s therapists John and Julie Gottman’s work on the “Four Horsemen Of The Apocalpyse,” they name the four behaviors that kill marriages, namely criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. Contempt, they say, is the single most dangerous behavior, and...
We Hurt Each Other When We Don’t Understand How Trauma Works
Gordon’s girlfriend Steph has to leave home for stretches of time for her work. They live together, and when they’re together, their relationship seems great. He’s happy to see her after work every day, he thinks fondly about her when he’s at work, he’s grateful for...
Israel, Gaza, Sociopathy & Why My Spiritual Beliefs Don’t Comfort Me Like They Used To
I was in Cape Cod on Saturday teaching an online class about spontaneous healing when I heard the news about the massacre in Israel. My partner Jeff and I were right across the water from my co-teacher of Memoir As Medicine and friend Nancy Aronie and her husband...
Why We Need To Support Whistleblowers If We Want To Hold Abusive Narcissists Accountable
After the UK Channel 4 Dispatches documentary and The Times long format article detailed the allegations of four women accusing Russell Brand of sexual assault broke the news, any other women who might also cry #MeToo were invited to come forward. In response to these...
Why Are People In The “Spiritual” and “Wellness” World Defending Russell Brand?
I know people are innocent until proven guilty in a court of law- and I believe due process is a good thing when someone in a position of power and authority is accused of abusing that power by sexual assaulting victims. But have you read what many so called...
Warning Signs Of Who Might Not Be Safe To Trust
If you’re anything like me, you may have been burned far too many times because you trusted people who were untrustworthy and felt blindsided when you realized your discernment failed to pick up on the red flags. In my internal family system, those parts in me are...
The Boundaries That Protect Healthy Intimacy
I’m reading a great book about boundaries, Anne Katherine’s Where To Draw The Line, with my partner Jeff. The whole book is great, but I just wanted to share with you all some of the Cliff Notes of what I really appreciated, which is a check list of helpful “Do’s” and...