As I explained in my blog about IFS-informed Dating and Dating The Day Democracy Died, I learned a ton about myself and my own parts by going on about thirty first dates before I wound up with my current partner Jeffrey Rediger, who I met at a trauma conference we...
When I embarked upon my online dating experiment in January 2021 and went on about thirty first dates, I took advantage of the opportunity to write about all my dates and notice which parts of me showed up on each date. I thought I had a pretty stable sense of self...
Before the pandemic, I’d been intentionally single because I was in a phase of trauma healing recovery that needed me to focus on my own needs and healing. My inclination towards codependent love addiction and making someone else’s needs matter more than my own was...
As my partner Jeff Rediger and I just finished writing about in our book Relationsick, compassion might not seem like a health issue, but it’s intimately tied to the health of the body. It turns out that when our bodies act up, the body is a trailhead we are...
I’ve been overwhelmed by what’s going on in our country right now and feeling helpless and speechless, while I sort out my own emotions, thoughts, beliefs, and call to action. One thing I know I can offer is psycho-education about narcissism and cult dynamics....
I was recently listening to one of my favorite podcasts, couples therapist Esther Perel’s Where Shall We Begin. In this episode, the woman who is co-parenting with a man is complaining because she feels like she’s carrying far more than her fair share of the...
Some people expect that their romantic relationships will be purely a sanctuary of refuge, a conflict-free zone of safe, nurturing connection, unconditional acceptance, pleasurable fun and joy, and nourishing companionship. Other people approach...
My partner Jeff Rediger and I are in Santorini now, working on co-writing our book about the health implications of narcissistic abuse and personal/ systemic oppression on the body, mind, and spirit. It’s very surreal to be writing in a cafe in Oia, in the...