Events
A Key Insight Into Why People You Love Might Be Flaky For Reasons Different Than You Think
We had an agreement, my partner and I. I would sacrifice spending Thanksgiving with my family to be with him and our friends in Boston. In exchange, he would spend Christmas in California with my family. That Thanksgiving in 2023 was our first holiday together, and...
Protest IS Patriotic
When I don’t know what to say because I’m in shock at what’s happening in our country, when it would be easier to stay silent than to try to give words to something unnameably unjust, when parts of me want to employ magical thinking, to live in pretend land for just a...
When The Muse Won’t Stop Nudging You Until You Write What You’re Here To Say
If your muse is relentless, like mine, you know exactly what I’m talking about. Maybe you’ve scribbled poetry on the backs of receipts or filled journals nobody’s ever seen. Maybe you’re the kind of person who processes life by writing about it—grief, rage, joy,...
The 3.5% Rule: Can We Overturn Authoritarianism If 3.5% Of Us Protest?
My partner Dr. Jeffrey Rediger and I attended two No Kings protests in Sebastapol and Santa Rosa. We were even captured in a photo on the front page of our local paper, The Press Democrat! My resisting bitch face with my sign "This Is My Resisting Bitch Face"...
Understanding Defensive Parts Through An IFS Lens, Part 1
There’s a moment in every healing journey when we meet the parts of ourselves that are armored up so tight, we can hardly breathe. Therapy is hard enough when we’re focusing on all the ways we’ve been victimized by the people who have hurt us. But it’ll knock the wind...
Unpacking The “Why” Of Harmful Relational Behaviors
Let’s be honest. Trauma survivors don’t always behave well. Even if they’re trauma symptom is people-pleasing niceness, that usually rides shotgun with passive aggressive resentment and punishing behaviors that result from poor boundaries and over-giving. But there’s...